Years of my life wasted. No progress. Mediocre Saturday nights spent at the casino drinking cheap piss, flirting with girls out of my reach, and gambling to look cool.
This was no way to live.
Eventually I came across the idea of disappear for 6 months.
6 months that can change your life (if you let it)
This is a challenge that’s as old as I can remember.
I first came across it at the age of 21. I was obsessed with nightclubs and becoming a DJ.
All I wanted to do on the weekend was bring a huge group of guys and gals everywhere I went to look popular for nightclub owners and hustle them for a DJ gig.
One friend named Jason stopped coming.
“You’ve changed man. All you do is stay at home by yourself, read books, and hang out with your stupid girlfriend,” I said.
What I later found is he took 6 months off hanging out with us to focus, work on his goals, prioritize himself, and transform mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically, and financially.
That’s what disappearing for 6 months is all about. Here’s how…
Don’t be afraid to leave your loser friends behind
When we don’t change it’s often because our friends don’t want us to. They like who we are. It’s convenient for them if we stay the same.
When I disappeared for 6 months to rebuild my life, I left behind a special category of friends: druggies.
I decided to no longer be around drugs, despite never taking them. It just led to too much drama. One friend hooked on coke had his $90K Audi stolen by a drug dealer.
“Ohhh well … nothing I can do about it.”
Imagine living like that. One day Audi, the next day gone … without a care in the world or any painful feelings.
Certain friends may need to exit your life. No pain, no gain.
Overcome fears that have held you back
One of my biggest fears before disappearing for 6 months was having lunch with another person.
Most people can eat with another person. I couldn’t. My eating disorder and anxiety were so bad, the thought of going to a restaurant haunted me for weeks before the big event.
I had to skip team lunches, romantic dates, family Christmases, etc.
It tore me up inside.
When I went into hibernation I committed to fixing the issue. First, I ate lunch with homeless people, as I knew they had bigger problems than worrying about whether I could finish a KFC Zinger burger.
The next category was group lunches where nobody could see if I ate or not. Then I had lunch with work colleagues I didn’t care about too much.
I slowly got comfortable eating around others again. Once the fear was gone I wrote a fear list. As often as I could, I tackled more fears from my list. Each time I beat a fear my self-confidence skyrocketed.
By the end of the 6 months I felt like a warrior. People thought I was superhuman.
Nothing other than Australian brown snakes scared me anymore.
Dare to add a second stream of income
Having money on the brain all the time is exhausting.
Remove the risk of one income by adding a second. I started by selling eBooks and charging for social media coaching. All of us have a hidden talent or a skill people want us to use for their benefit.
Make money after hours outside of your job.
Attend live events where bat viruses lurk
The last live event I went to (a baby expo) I caught the dreaded bat virus plague. But you know what …
You can’t hide at home forever.
Live events are powerful. It’s where you make new connections with people who’ll throw new ideas into your brain without you knowing.
During my disappearance I paid over $1000 to attend a Tony Robbins event. The after-effects are still reverberating in my life after more than 5 years.
Get out there and get amongst it.
Start writing online
Most people misunderstand writing on the internet.
Writing is thinking.
When you write online it forces you to sweep your brain for ideas and understand the value you bring to the world. Writing is yet another way, too, to attract new people into your life who can change your life.
LinkedIn posts or tweets are a great place to start.
Get addicted to the gym like Rocky
I don’t give a fudge if you get washboard abs. That’s not the point.
During my 6 month disappearance I hit the gym hard. The reason I haven’t shared this before is that I was heartbroken. A girl I loved dumped me for a better-looking man and I was mad as hell.
I naively thought bigger muscles would make her regret the decision.
But as I started going to the gym every day it wasn’t the muscle gain that mattered. No. It was the shift in my mindset. And it was the fact, for the first time in a long time, I’d built a new habit and stuck with it.
Hit the gym for 6 months to change your mind and learn about habits that’ll change how you use your time.
Detox from chemical-rich food
I made radical changes to my diet during my disappearance.
- No more junk food
- No more fried foods
- No more Coca-Cola
- No more ordering takeaway every night
I began eating mostly plants as an experiment.
I stopped eating for taste, and started eating for energy.
It took a while for the detox to work, but after about 3 months I noticed significant gains in energy. I then redeployed this new energy back into my quiet transformation.
Drown in water
Drinking a gallon a day of water helped hydrate me more. My skin stopped being so dry too.
Reinvent your sleep
I was a tired grandpa before.
Hitting nightclubs at 3 AM on a Wednesday messed with my circadian rhythm. Night and day became blurred. My body clock was messed up.
So I made a new goal. Go to bed at 8 PM and wake up at 4 AM. Now I don’t think this works for most people, obviously. But it’s not the time of day I woke up that matters.
It’s the fact I started to get more sleep and make use of the mornings.
The more you sleep the more free energy you get to enjoy life. The world looks different when your energy levels increase. The brain fog lifts.
Read unconventional books
I had never read before my disappearance.
School taught me to hate reading. And my eyes would get tired from reading paperback books in dimly lit rooms. Then I got the Kindle app for iPad. Wow. Huge change.
Reading felt different. I bought lots of books and began reading them. I learned so much more than any Youtube video I’d skip through or watch at 5x speed ever taught me.
Right now I’m about to start reading a book written by Russell Brunson. My wife thinks I’m a giant weirdo.
The weirder the books you read the more different you become.
DM like a man whore
The real world is limited by neighborhoods, state lines, and airports.
I learned that online you had access to billions of people no matter where you lived. So I got good at sending direct messages on social media.
You can literally contact anyone you want and strike up a conversation. Those conversations will lead to new ideas you can use to change your life.
Buy financial assets
Most of us don’t understand finance.
And that’s okay. It’s never too late to learn. I spent hours learning about stocks, bonds, dividends, crypto, etc.
Rather than throw my money into a savings account because I hated complexity, I learned how to make money work for me while I sleep through the basics of investing.
Trade time to learn how to make more money. Then you won’t always need to sell your time to an employer to pay the electricity bill.
During these 6 months you want to have intense focus. The best hack I’ve found to dial up focus is to play movie soundtracks while I do deep work.
Or you can play white noise if you want to be a basic human.
Learn new online skills
Let’s finish on this one.
I’ve always wanted to be the best in the world at something. During these 6 months of hibernation, I learned that to join the top 1% in any field is hard.
Dilbert creator Scott Adams taught me it’s easier to combine two skills where you’re in the top 25%, instead. So I took writing online and my entrepreneurial skills and combined them.
If you want to increase your value, make more money, and not have to work like a slumdog — acquiring new skills is the fastest way.
It’s why websites like Teachable and Skillshare are so popular. Follow your curiosity and see if you can build a unique skill stack.
That’s the last thing I’d do if you want to experiment with disappearing for 6 months to change your life.